well, i wasnt sure if this should be touched upon, because its kind of a dark subject haha….but i think its important something be said about it.
what do i strongly feel about? DEPRESSION, and the misconceptions and misunderstanding of the disease that surrounds it. personally associated with this my whole life; now i see that people seem to think it of as passing feeling, self pity, something that is easy to get over.

..well, its NOT easy to get over, and unless you have actually FELT what it feels like, undescribable feelings of despair; the most empathy you might recieve is, “cool story bro.”
i recently attended a discussion session about depression at my church, and was a little disappointed that even after the session was over, people were joking and did not seem to understand the impact of this problem…
i think awareness really needs to be raised about the psychological impact of depression and that yes, although it doesnt exactly ravage your body like physical diseases can, depression is one of the greatest silent killers – people commit suicide all the time…often occuring with people you would NEVER have guessed had a problem; because its not something that they would ever mention to you. perhaps they thought it inappropriate…or didnt want to show they were suffering…or found it shameful.


someone i know recently passed away; i was not that close but from what his relatives have been saying, it may have been suicide. and i was so shocked, because that person seemed so confident with life. kind of see what im getting at? [R.I.P you will be missed…]


depression is probably one of the most overlooked problems as everyone, can have negative feelings at a point in their life, but this is not necessarily depression. there are different causes for depression, it can manifest itself in different ways, so i cannot tell you ‘okay, THIS is what depression is.” but! the point im trying to make is…understand that these negative feelings of worthlessness, despair, feelings that nothing in the world will save you and it may be better to end everything – understand that this is not something to be taken lightly […can you think of how bad you would feel, to want to end your life?], and that it consumes your mind, so much it is DIFFICULT to snap out of that train of thought.


it is a very, very prevalent thing. your close friends…your siblings…your parents…it can hit anyone. and you probably won’t even know.

so. im trying to think of a way to haha um…increase empathy towards this problem. but im not sure how. hit me up on if you can give me any ideas!:D




haha okay and something on a slightly more positive note, check out AZIATIX‘s new song ‘cold’! definitely pretty awesome. eddie still needs to cut his hair though.






– beckii xo


feature image credits to ME….rofl. one of the first digital pics i did was that eye.

  1. Its sad when one gets depressed to where they think of suicide. My friend was once sad over his break up, because he thought he really loved her and that he wanted to be with her so bad. He said it was his fault. Constantly blaming himself for nothing, because it wasnt his fault. He was so depressed to where he also thought about suicide. He tried to overdose on medicine. Took pain pills and sleeping pills, hoping to not wake up. I told him that she did him wrong and is playing him like theres no tomorrow. Yet he still felt like he neglected her.

    I also had my moments of depression where I thought nothing was going my way, and that I was being punished for being bad all those years ago. I also thought about suicide. Then I was like, well theres more to life. I might be having obstacles right now, but the future may look up for me. Because honestly, we dont know what the future holds. Things might be bad now, but really.. what does the future hold? I could have the life. A big house, nice cars, lots of kids, and look where I am now. A boyfriend and a beautiful little boy.

    And thats what everyone should think about. The future, just because you think its bad now, the future may have a brighter side. People should talk it out with people. Thats what friends and family are far, and even if they cant turn to those dear to them, strangers can be good to talk to, too. No lie. I guess to help give them courage by letting people who has experienced things like this tell their story. Or you can tell help them by basically saying that the future can be better, and tell them all the things that can happen for the better. :/

    I hope people think twice about these types of things. Ohhh. I also think about how they say, if you commit suicide, that you have no chance of going to Heaven, cause that sure scares me and makes me think twice! </3

    • whotolduthat says:

      yep, absolutely. talking it out definitely helps because its that weight off your chest….even if its not to someone you know. in fact that might be easier in some circumstances because they cant really judge you if they dont know you, haha=P if you have depression…you are not alone

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